Healing Memories

I was almost diagnosed with PTSD a couple of years ago.  Let me clarify on almost. I went to a therapist to help cope from traumatic childhood memories. In order for health insurance to cover our second meeting I had to be given a diagnosis.  I did not want to be diagnosed nor be prescribed medication so I never returned.

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder is caused by traumatic experiences.  I carried traumatic childhood memories with me into my adulthood.   These memories played over and over in my head like a broken record player.  I had many triggers that would immediately set me back to a memory in childhood and I would relive the same pain all over again. It was like being haunted from the past.

I always told myself when I had my own family I would make it different. I would give my kids the ultimate childhood.

You will hear me say over and over again that the best gift we can give to one another is the gift of happy memories.  When we look back at our lives that is what will matter the most.  The stuff we have collected will not hold a candle to the time we spent with those we loved making memories. Love is spelled T I M E.

If you know me I am constantly on the go. I am always looking for something new to experience and new places to go. It might look like I am insane but  I am looking for ways to make memories with and for my children. I want them to grow up with lots of loving memories of their childhood. These are my gifts to them.

What I have come to realize that all the new memories I have been making for them have been healing me.  The new memories are writing over the traumatic ones just like a hard drive in a computer.  The files aren’t being erased just being replaced with better ones.  All these new happy memories are  beautiful images in my mind that fosters feelings of joy.

You don’t have to go far or spend a lot of money to make happy memories with your family. The best memories are just when you are being playful and having fun.  I read a quote that said children are happy when their parents are happy. It makes sense if you live in a home that is filled with turmoil as a kid how happy could you possibly be?

 

The BEST memories we have made as a family are at Walt Disney World. They are the best for me because when I was a little girl I dreamed of the day I would go to Walt Disney World with my own family.  I actually have a full wall in my house just full of pictures from our Disney vacations.  It was Walt Disney himself that said,  “A dream is a wish your heart makes.”

When I am in Disney with my family I turn into the ultimate kid. Whats so great is that I get to experience the ultimate childhood only in my 30’s. Hey, it’s better late than never.

I can not begin to describe the joy that I feel watching my kids at Disney.  I get to take those moments of their happiness with me.  It is redemption.

The best memories can also be made in the simplest moments.  It’s in the unexpected moment when my son grabs my face and says he loves me. It’s  watching my daughter dance at her first recital.  Its listening to my oldest child sing in church. Its just being there and loving one another each and every day.

Who knew being so busy trying to give my kids the childhood I always wanted would heal me from the one I didn’t want. My wish is that when they grow that they find happiness and share it with others.

Every kid deserves a childhood full of happy memories.

How happy is your family?